Doubly Rude and Once Ginger
by Abstracted
Summary: Man comes out from a blue box in the middle of an almost-war between two shinobi nations. Kushina investigates.
1. The Man that came from the Blue Box

**Doubly Rude and Once Ginger**

Note: Now I know how ridiculous this cross over is, and even kind of stupid! I am currently writing a Naruto/HP crossover, and I am also writing a Doctor Who fanfiction, and so things started to mix in my head, so I thought…why not a Naruto/Doctor Who or HP/Doctor Who. The former is not done very often, so I decided to tackle it first. Anything can happen with the Doctor! If we can have Psychotic stone angels, murderous pepperpots, gas mask zombies repeating 'I want my mummy', then there certain could be magical (with proper sci-fi explanation DW-style), colorful ninjas! Now, the hardest thing was naming this story.

This is short, only probably spanning 4-5 chapters. The first chapter is always the shortest. And the subsequent chapters are much longer, I promise.

Warning: there is no actual plot! As in, no alien trying to take over the planet or eating people or stuff like that.

Note on names: I don't care if they aren't consistent. Honestly. I don't.

It is the 10th doctor, after The Water of Mars and before the End of Time

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><p><em>One: The Man that came from the Blue Box <em>

Kushina first heard the odd, mechanical wheezing sound at midday as she settled behind a boulder for lunch (or the pathetic excuse for a lunch that was handful of crackers and water). She froze momentarily, out of habit than fear, and listened in the attempt to ascertain the distance and source of the sound. When the wheezing stopped, she quickly peeked out from behind the boulder, crackers still in hand.

"What the…" she muttered to herself, eyebrows knitting at the sight before her. Sitting out in the clearing was a large, rectangular blue box, with the word's 'Police Box' printed at the top. She squinted, trying to make out the words written on the plaque on one of the double doors, but she was too far and the words were too small. Suddenly, the door flung open, causing her to jump a little and retreat back behind the boulder. She cursed at her nerves.

"Well, this is interesting," a man's voice said, sounding very intrigued and even amused, "This seems normal. I think." She heard him sniff, and mutter, "Yup, similar gas composition to Earth—ooh, pines, junipers—earth species. What, am I back on Earth?"

Kushina wondered if he was talking to someone. She couldn't hear a second set of footstep. _Was_ he talking to himself? She shook her head: no, the more important question was whose side he was on, what village he was from, what in the world is a police phone box (and why is it blue?), why he was in there, and why did it pop out in the middle of the forest? Kushina wondered briefly how she was going to accomplish getting all of that. She had to admit to herself, this part of shinobi work wasn't her forte.

"Hm…supposedly not on earth," he continued, "Lovely—could be a new earth? Or new new earth...or…"

Was he a spy? thought Kushina, because if he was, he made a horrible spy, unless he was speaking in code to whoever else was out there. This didn't make sense either since she knew, after some proper scouting, there was no one out there but her, at least in a 2 mile radius, unless he was speaking into a radio…or something. Kushina scowled as the imaginative part of her mind produced a myriad of other possibilities that just confused her. She supposed there was only one way to find out: investigate. She formed the seals and whispered, "Kage Bunshin no Jutsu"! A perfect duplicate appeared in front of her, and the twins grinned at each other knowingly. The clone nodded and left the hiding place, and Kushina peeked out from the boulder and watched.

"Oh hello there!" the man greeted happily—too happily for the time and place. The clone Kushina approached him cautiously, looking him up and down. The man was tall, slight, definitely not built and definitely not a shinobi, unless he was medic or something non-combat. His hair was too well kept for him to have been on the battlefield for too long, properly gelled up and everything, and his attire was way too civilian for him to be here, in the middle of a forest, of all places, and was also much too clean and crisp. Kushina didn't know how anyone could move properly in that, heavy looking brown coat.

"Who are you?" she asked, her hands going to her kunai holster, "What are you doing here?"

"I'm the Doctor," he answered, "And I don't know what I'm doing here, actually, but that's half the fun, isn't it, the not knowing?" His tone was gleeful and excited, his pitch a tad too high. Kushina knitted her eyebrows together, puzzled.

"You're not supposed to be here!" she told him, not that it would help any.

"I'm not?" he asked with a half smile, "Well, sorry about that. Always happens, you see, always end up where I'm not supposed to be. What is 'here' anyways? Where am I?"

Kushina was now looking at him with amazement, "Do you not know?"

"No I don't," he said lightly, a smile still etched on the narrow face, his large brown eyes widening happily. "Well, despite the fact that I am in a very green, lush forest on a very human-inhabitable planet speaking with a little ginger girl. By the way, great hair—bright ginger you are, unapologetic—"

"WHO are you?" she demanded impatiently, while in the back of her mind she was mildly pleased by his hair comment, though she puzzled over the term 'ginger'.

"I told you," he said with knowing smirk, "I'm the Doctor."

"Yes, but doctor who?" She was not enjoying his evasive answers, though as a shinobi she was used to not getting straight answers. Still annoyed the hell out of her.

"Just, the Doctor," he answered with the same gleeful expression.

She was unconvinced. "THE Doctor?" she said, quirking both eyebrows at him. Codename, possibly.

"Yup," he answered, popping the 'p' with great enthusiasm, "THE Doctor. The only one, the genuine, Doctor."

"Right," she muttered, "Whatever, you're in a forest in the middle outside of Konoha, in a bit of…situation. How could you not know that? Are a civilian? If you are, you should get out of here as fast as possible!"

"Konoha, never heard of it…" he muttered, "Why should I go? Is the 'situation' dangerous?"

"You're on hostile grounds!" she nearly shouted.

"Hostile?" he repeated, "Why hostile? What's hostile?"

"That!" she cried, pointing at something behind him. He wheeled around to catch sight of a large burly man forming odd signs with his hands. Suddenly, the earth rumbled and crumbled beneath his feet. A slab of earth erupted from the ground and towered over them like some sort of tidal wave.

"What?" the Doctor cried, watching the scene in amazement, "What?" He eyes fell on the blue box as it started to sink into the crumbling earth. "No no no no NO!" He started to run towards, and the Kushina clone panicked. She reached out and grabbed the tail end of this coat and pulled him back.

"Don't be stupid!" she yelled angrily, "You'll be killed!"

"No, you don't understand!" he said, trying to yank his coat loose from her iron grip, "That's my ship! I can't let it—"

She tugged harder and the Doctor flew backwards away from the disappearing blue box. He whirled around, angrily, towards the girl, but could hardly get a word in when a large slab of earth collided with her head. The Doctor momentarily forgot about his box, and stared, mouth agape in horror, at the scene, but was given even more shock when the girl merely poofed away in a small could of smoke

"Wha—"

"Over here!"

The Doctor turned around to the voice, which was, he recognized with utter amazement, was the same as the girl who had just disappeared. And so it was: Kushina was on top of the boulder, beckoning to him impatiently. "Come on!"

The Doctor ran towards her without a second thought, scrambling as the ground was now turn to dust beneath him. He grabbed her hands, and she pulled him up easily, as if he weighed very little. He had no time to comment as she put an arm around his waist and jumped high into the sky as the tidal wave earth crashed onto the boulder. The Doctor watched, speechless (for once), as they rose dozens of feet into the air, cold wind rushing past him and his coat fluttering wildly. He glanced at the girl, with her long wild red hair and determined face. Finally, they landed on a tree top, though they didn't stay long as she hopped down onto a lower branch, and then started to spring from branch to branch away from the chaos. When they were a safe distance away, she landed on the ground and threw him down unceremoniously.

The Doctor took a moment to regain his composure and settle his stomach, all the while keeping an eye on his young savior who was leaning against a tree, trying to catch her breath.

"Wha…" he began, "What was that?"

"A shinobi from Iwa," she answered, biting her lips nervously, "An earth-style technique. I think we've lost him."

"Did that man do that?" he asked, in disbelief.

"Obviously," she replied with an exasperated sigh.

"Obviously?" he repeated with a bit of frustration. The Doctor reached over and tapped on her forehead protector. "You're not human, are you?" He reached into his coat pocket for something.

"Of course I am!" she said hotly, taking step away from him, "Geez, you country rube! If you've never seen a shinobi before, don't make it too obvious!"

"Oi, watch it!" he warned, still fumbling around in his pocket "Rube? Rude much? Rude _and_ ginger, I see, not unlike someone I used to know! Now, I've never seen a human jump 20 feet in the air without help or create an earthquake with his hand, so you can't be _just_ humans." He paused, and then said, frowning, "Well, not on Earth. I'm definitely not an Earth, am I?"

"Earth?" she said, incredulously, "What, are you from a different planet or something?"

"Yes, I am," he answered, offhandedly, "AH! Here we go!" He pulled out an odd, pen-like instrument from his pocket.

She narrowed her eyes and then scoffed, rolling her eyes, "Right—what _are_ you doing!" The Doctor held his odd little silver pen instrument to her eyes, which now made a strange humming noise and lit up blue at one end. He moved it all around and up and down, as if scanning her. When he came to her stomach, he paused momentarily, and Kushina froze immediately, her jaws clamping, hoping that pause was just accidental, not meaningful at all. He gave her just the briefest of a questioning glance, before he retracted the instrument and said, jovially, "Right! Done!"

"What was that?" she asked weakly.

"Sonic screwdriver," he answered, offering no further explanation as he started scanning the environment with it. "And nope, not human, well not exactly human. Well, a branch, very very close still, of course. Still look human, for the most part."

"What are you talking about? And stop that, it makes too much noise! They'll be able to track us if you keep doing that!"

The Doctor turned to look at her, curiously, "Who's they?"

"The enemy," she answered, "I told you we're on hostile grounds."

"Enemy?" the Doctor mumbled, ruffling his hair "Is it? Never a shortage of those. So what exactly is the situation here, uh—oh, how rude of me, never asked your name! What _is_ your name?"

She hesitated briefly before she told him, "Kushina."

"Wonderful name," he said with a broad, amused grin, "Kushina. Rolls nicely off this tongue! Kushina! So, what is the situation here, huh? Attacked by a man who creates stone tidal waves? A little ginger girl hopping around like a monkey? Having dopplegangers that poof into smoke? Hm?"

"What's ginger?" she asked distractedly. She had been so curious about the word that she had let him slide for likening her to a monkey.

"Red hair," he answered, motioning to her hair, "Color, usage…you know, from…where I usually… frequent. Anyways, go on."

"Okay. We're in the middle of struggle with the Stone Village. They started it, but we want to keep this from blowing up into a real war, you see." She stopped abruptly, frowning at the image of the Doctor listening intently. "Why am I telling you this? I shouldn't be telling you this. You could be a spy for all I know!"

"Nope!" exclaimed the Doctor, throwing his hands up a little, "Not spy. I told you, alien, peaceful, what was it you humans always say…OH! 'I come in peace.'"

"You're mad," she decided, after a brief moment of staring at him like he was the oddest person she's ever laid eyes on. She nodded her head and crossed her arms, "But you're right, not a spy—a spy would have more believable, less mental cover story!"

"Thanks," he returned cheekily, "So, Leaf and Stone village are at war, or about to be at war—mind you, not the most creative names are they?"

Kushina rolled her eyes.

"So, they're in a middle of an almost-war in this forest," the Doctor continued, slipping his hands in his pants pocket. He lowered his head with his eyes set intently on her, and frowned. "So, what is a little thing like you doing here?"

"Lit-little?" she sputtered angrily, "I'm not little! And _what_ do you think I'm doing here? Look at this—" She motioned at her forehead protector, "I'm only a few weeks away from being promoted to jounin, you know!"

"Huh, what _is_ it?" the Doctor murmured, leaning forward to examine the headband, "Hm, shiny, metal alloy. What's that symbol? Looks like a leaf."

She angrily whacked him away and took another step back. "You're _really_ aren't from around here," she mumbled, "It's a forehead protector, and it's the symbol of the Leaf Village."

"Brilliant," he said, almost excitedly, "Something to protect the forehead and protect your brains, and functions also as a show for village pride! Though can't say that would keep you safe in this almost-war."

Kushina rolled her eyes, realizing he hadn't gotten the point of the headband. She let out an exaggerated, irritated sigh. "I'm a shinobi, you dolt! I'm fighting here!"

"Fighting!" he exclaimed incredulously, "What? Shinobi? As in ninja? You? What…am I in medieval Japan?" He looked her up and down and muttered, "Not dressed right…"

"No," she replied, "Never heard of it. I told you, a forest near Leaf."

"Well, that _is_ particular, never heard of Japan? I am not on earth at all then." Frowning, he started to circle Kushina, looking her up and down. "But fighting? You're a child! You're about what, thirteen or fourteen?"

"I'm sixteen!" she corrected irritably, "I'm not a child! I've been at this since was 12 and even younger I've probably seen more than you ever have!"

"Twelve!" he shouted even louder, shaking his head, "No no, not very good, also, that last part, not true—definitely not true. But twelve! Fighting at such an age!"

"Keep your voice down!"

"Yes, _shout_ that at me, why don't you?" he returned dryly.

Her retort was drowned out by loud moaning of the ground beneath them as the earth started to crack open.

"Oh…" the Doctor began a bit anxiously, "Not good. I am sure this is where we start running, am I right?" He looked at Kushina, who was nodding while regarding the cracking earth with wide eyes.

"Oh yeah! Run!"

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><p>AN: I believe three more chapters left after this! Please review if you enjoy itwant me continue/don't think this is the stupidest crossover idea.


	2. The Superior Alien from Outer Space

**Doubly Rude and Once Ginger**

Abstracted.

Note: I have never had a writer's block this big before. Really. It got worse the more I tried to work through it. I'm actually having trouble imagining things in my head. D: I tried to write this chapter no less than a dozen times, and yet I am not happy with it (though this is my 'happiest with' version). But it's driving me insane, so I'm going to submit this and hope it'll pass for now. Once I am more inspired to write…I will…write. My other big story Telos is getting the worst of this disgusting block. Ugh.

Happy Late New Year's everyone.

I am a thousand times sorry for not updating for months.

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><p>Two: The Superior Alien from Outer Space, or so he says<p>

The man who called himself the Doctor was most certainly a civilian. He did not know how to use chakra to increase his running speed, forcing Kushina to double back so she did not lose him. She had a heart too kind to leave the man to his death, especially after that comment about her hair. She smiled widely at the thought, her mind conjuring up the image of the only other person to say he liked her hair—all yellow and smiles.

Kushina pushed the image out of her mind and glanced down. The Doctor was outrunning the fissure technique, but it was catching up fast. She needed to get him off the ground before it caught up and swallowed him whole. Her mind whizzed together a plan and she formed the signs, muttering "Kage bunshin no jutsu!" Her double appeared, nodded at her and bounced down to the Doctor. Before he realized what was happening, she had wrapped one arm around his rather skinny chest and jumped up into the higher branches. The Doctor, spluttering and recovering from the sudden save, looked wildly at Kushina's clone, at Kushina, and then nodded at her in thanks, swallowing his surprise and curiosity, though he wasn't going to enjoy being carried along like a rag doll by a sixteen year old girl.

They cleared the forest, but the fissure was catching up fast, and Kushina realized in panic that they had no more trees to use as buffer. The sound of the cracking earth grew louder and louder behind them.

They kept on running as they hit the ground, and the Doctor trailed behind the two redheaded teenagers from the beginning. The girls didn't even seem half as tired as he was. Now, the Doctor knew he was in pretty good shape—sure he wasn't an Adonis, but his cardio was excellent (at least twice as better as the above average human sprinter thanks to Time Lord biology and his occupation as a meddler)—so he was very impressed by the girl's (or girls'?) stamina. It was almost super human—definitely a fascinating evolutionary route for the species, one he's only seen a few times, but never quite like this.

"This is ridiculous!" one Kushina cried to other, "How much chakra does this jerk have anyways?"

The other replied, "Look at this way: if we can escape this he'll be too exhausted and out of chakra to chase us anymore!"

"Good point!"

"Oh this certainly puts a new spin on talking to oneself…" the Doctor mumbled, though neither Kushinas could hear him. He realized that he could not tell which one was the original and which one was the copy, though it seemed to him, from what he saw earlier, that the clone was not entirely independent or stable. He wondered if the clone was more of a mental projection than an actual clone, like a mirrored perception filter or other types of projected holograph. Though how this actually worked and how she could conjure up something like this he was not sure of, but it was sure to be fascinating. Unfortunately, mental associations made him think of his own recent clone, and he shook away the thoughts angrily to prevent himself from recalling more unwanted memories.

One of the Kushinas glanced back and skidded to a stop. "Wait!" she shouted, "I think it's done!" The Doctor and the other Kushina stopped also, and they indeed saw that the great fracture in the earth that was chasing them froze just a few feet behind them.

"Just like that?" asked the Doctor, between heavy breaths. He looked at crack doubtfully, "A bit anti-climatic don't you think?"

"Hah!" one of the Kushina cried triumphantly, "Now I can say that I successfully out ran an earthquake technique!"

The Doctor considered her words, and nodded, realizing this was his first one as well. "To be quite honest," he said, "So could I. You know, I've actually never done that before. Quite the accomplishment—a good one for the list; and I haven't even had lunch yet." He looked at the two Kushinas. "Now, before we go any further—which one of you is the real one?"

One, to his left, raised her hand, "Me!"

"Okay good. Though I'm sure I'll lose track of you again. Can one of you tie your hair up or something?"

Both Kushinas rolled their eyes and looked at each other (he was very mused by the synchronized behaviors). The original Kushina nodded, and her doppelganger on his right poofed into smoke.

"That works too."

"You didn't need to tell us apart you know," Kushina said with a smirk, "We're all the same. Everything my clones know, I know."

"You're all one consciousness?" asked the Doctor in surprise, "Like a hive mind of sorts, though you are projecting your own image as the temporary agent." He crossed his arms and looked at her up and down, "But that's not it, your consciousness actually multiply—which explains how you two actually converse with each other because your clone can have independent thoughts, yet you're also connected. That's brilliant!" He grinned broadly at her, "In theory you could be in multiple places at once and learn multiple things at once! The potential is frightfully exciting…and just frightful."

"Huh…" Kushina said, regarding the Doctor with a puzzled frown, "Learning multiple things at once…never thought about it that way. It is a high level technique that requires a good reservoir of chakra. Anyways, it's good when you're alone and need a extra pair of eyes, fists, hands or feet or—"

"Or company," added the Doctor.

"Now, that's just getting a little pathetic," Kushina mumbled, shaking her head, "Though I know of people who use kage bunshin for company, and…other things…" She paused, grimacing as unwanted images crept into her mind. She shook her head and said, "Pathetic, lonely, perverted and egotistical."

"You keep saying _chakra_," the Doctor pursued curiously, "What exactly is that? 'Cause the chakra I know of can in no way power earthquakes or create clones."

"Well, Doctor whoever you are," Kushina said abruptly, waving away his question, "That's not important right now. We should get out of here before more enemies comes. I've got to get back to my team and get you to safety."

"Well, if I can find my ship, that'll be just fantastic. I can give you a lift too."

"Your ship?" Kushina asked, puzzled, "I didn't see a ship of any sorts. Just that blue box thing you stepped out of."

The Doctor smiled knowingly, and with much affection he said, "That's her."

The Kushina looked at him unbelievingly and insisted stubbornly, "Is not."

"Is too," the Doctor said defensively, "Now if we can find her, or get some equipment so that I build a tracker. Oh remind me to put in that function the next time I update the sonic screwdriver. Why I never did it before astounds me. You know, I can detect antimatter with this thing." He had taken out the pen-like sonic screwdriver and showed it to her, "But can't find my own ship—isn't that just ridiculous?" The wide, frightfully amused grin he had on his face was just as ridiculous to Kushina, who had trouble figuring out what to say next.

One thing she was sure of was that a blue box couldn't be a ship of any sorts, so she stubbornly continued: "But, it's a small blue box. It's a _box_! Even if you really are an alien how could a wooden blue—" She stopped suddenly when the ground beneath her left food collapsed, and she tumbled forward. She looked down, frowning, realizing what was happening.

"Don't move," she told the Doctor. The Doctor nodded silently, understanding.

"Take my hand. If I can jump up really fast I think we can—" But it was too late: the floor suddenly caved in, and they started falling.

Kushina's first awareness after the fall was the ridiculous pounding pain on the left side of her head, like someone had gotten inside her skull and was pounding on it from the inside. Groaning, she instinctively tried to burrow her head into a pillow that didn't exist. This of course, meant that she was actually grinding her head into the gravelly ground, which proved to be very painful. Kushina shot up immediately, yelling out from the pain.

"Kushina," the Doctor's voice called her, "Kushina? Are you alright?"

Kushina, scrunching her face up in pain, opened her eyes only to see darkness.

"Why is it so dark?" she mumbled almost sleepily.

"Because we're caved in," was the Doctor's reply.

"What?" Kushina cried out in alarm.

"Don't panic."

"I'm not!"

"You sound like you are."

Kushina made a face at the comment, though the Doctor couldn't see. "How did this happen?"

"We were falling, remember? I'm guessing into some hole, and the opening close up on us. Though why it didn't crush us is an interesting question. Not complaining mind you."

"Where are you?"

"In relation to you? No idea. Here, think I've got a gravity globe somewhere in here."

"A what?"

Suddenly a while light illuminated the space they were in, and Kushina saw that it came from a globular object floating a few feet above her.

"Ah gravity globe! Immensely useful. Good thing I decided to keep one in my coat."

Kushina stared at the globe in wonder, trying to remember if she had seen or heard anything like it before. It floated up further further, and stopped just a few feet from the ceiling.

"Long way up..." she heard the Doctor say. And a long fall, she thought grimly, marveling how relatively unscratched both she and the Doctor were, not that she was complaining. A fall from that high onto a stony floor usually broke _something_.

Kushina turned her attention from the globe to the Doctor, who was standing just a few feet from her. In the white light, he seemed infinitely taller, and seemed relatively undamaged. That brown hair of his was still stubbornly styled up and his long coat looked perfectly undisturbed.

"You alright?" he asked, looking down at her.

"Yeah," she groaned, "Think I hit my head, but I'll be fine."

"You sure?" He crouched down in front her, and looked her head, "I don't see external bruising. Might be a concussion."

Kushina shook her head. "Just give me a bit, I'll be fine. Really."

"If you say so," the Doctor muttered, looking unconvinced, "I would give you aspirin, but as I am deathly allergic to the stuff I don't carry it on me." He opened his coat and starting digging into the inner pockets. "I do have so antibiotic, and some antipresperant if you're feeling you need it. Don't know why I have that on me; I don't need it. You know, I might have—"

"I'm fine," Kushina insisted, shaking her head, "Just give me a moment to collect myself."

"Alright then," he said, still looking unconvinced. He stood and walked away from her. Kushina let out a sigh and gingerly felt the left side of her head. It probably was a concussion, but it wasn't something her body couldn't handle.

"Well this is certainly interesting," she heard the Doctor say. She looked up at him. He was looking up and at the walls, his eyes narrowed in thought. He ran one palm over the wall, then tapped on it.

"What is it?" she asked, pushing herself off the floor. Her balance was still a little off, but she was able to walk towards him.

"It's smooth," the Doctor answered.

"What?"

"The walls are smooth, polished, and…" He turned around and observed the area they were in, "Perfectly circular."

Kushina felt the wall too, and looked around. The man was right—the area they were in was perfectly round and the walls were polished—it even seemed to reflect shine from the gravity globe. She looked up, and as far as her eyes could see with their gravity globe, the walls over their enclosure looked was polished and smooth, and perfectly circular. Kushina realized that they had fallen into not a random hole, but some kind of room.

"Where are we?" she asked.

"Don't ask me," the Doctor said, "I haven't been on this planet even an hour."

She glanced at the Doctor who was now crouched down and looking intently at the part of the wall across from her. Frowning, she watched as he pressed his ears against it, knocked on it, and then pulled back and stared at the wall with a puzzled expression. He took out that blue-ended thing he called a sonic screwdriver and he scanned the walls with it. Kushina crossed her arms, curiously watching as the Doctor frowned, muttered to himself, put the screwdriver away and lightly tapped on the wall. He repeated this for several more minutes. He either knew exactly what he was doing, she decided, or he was off really his rocker. Of course, the latter would be true even if he knew what he was going.

Finally, Kushina took a step forward and leaned in slightly. She cleared her throat and asked, "What are you doing?"

"Finding a way out," he answered without turning to look at her.

Kushina lifted her brows at him. "By talking to the wall?"

"Don't sound so doubtful," said the Doctor, "You can learn a lot by talking to walls, you'd be surprised." He stood up and nudged her towards the wall. "Go on, say 'hi'!"

"Are you mad?" she asked, "Did that fall hit you too hard? Or are you trying to be clever, cause if you are I don't have the patience for it."

"Trying to be clever? Me? _Trying_?" said the Doctor, his voice hitting an insulted, high note, "I don't _try_ to be clever, Kushina, I _am_ clever. Cleverest person you'll meet in the universe. But back to your original question, yes, I can be quite mad, but no need to worry, it's never serious, or temporary. Though it might be a little contagious."

Kushina sighed exasperatedly and gave him an irritated look. He returned an innocent, charming smile. She looked at the wall with a scowl on her face and said, "Alright then, what have the walls told you?"

"That one should try the door before searching for the key, or rather, one should look for the door first…or something…you know they're never really quite clear, these walls," said the Doctor with quirky sagacity, and took out his sonic screw driver again and twirled it in his hands, "I believe I've found the door and I think I know how to open it…"

"What, you've found a door?" she exclaimed, surprised, "Where? I don't see one…"

"No no…we can't," said the Doctor. He walked to the center of the room and pointed the screwdriver to the section of the wall he had just been examining. "There's some sort of energy, psychic, well, not exactly psychic energy, that's enshrouding this place and creating some sort of perception filter to make us think that there isn't a door."

"To make us think…" repeated Kushina, puzzled, "You mean like an illusion technique."

"Right! An illusion!" the Doctor exclaimed happily, "Brilliant. Yes, it's an illusion, and since it's an illusion, we can walk right through the area on the wall where the illusion is!"

"Then let me guess," started Kushina pertly, "We can't actually walk right through it. Am I right?"

"And what makes you say that?"

She smirked. "Because if you could, you would have already done it."

"Oh ho," the Doctor exclaimed, shooting her a thoroughly amused grin, "Getting clever here aren't we? Unfortunately, only half right. We have to get rid of the illusion first—since for some reason there is a physical aspect to it."

"Right, then release it."

"And I shall," the Doctor replied with a firm nod, "Now I just have to find the mechanism with which they're creating this very interesting energy field. You see, it's not merely psychic energy, there something physical about it—it really isn't there, but it's even gotten into my head that I feel something solid there. There is a physical energy I think that is creating a network of—"

"Oh don't…." moaned Kushina, "I suck at illusion techniques, and theory even bore me more. Just release the illusion."

"Yes, I'm trying to figure out—"

"What's there to figure out?" she asked impatiently, "Isn't the hardest part about illusion technique recognizing it? Now that we know there is an illusion, releasing it is simple…." She paused at the odd look the Doctor was giving her, "Ah…let me guess, you don't know how to…"

"Do you mean releasing it like with a hand movement…you called it a technique…the same kind that the man used before? And like your clones?"

"Yeah same thing…well different signs…"

"That's fascinating! You're able to manipulate large amounts of psychic and physical energy with hand movements—now that's something I've never seen before! I love seeing things I've never seen before. The only reason I do anything at all, really. The universe is really a fantastic place isn't it? Millions of light years away, probably thousands of years into the future, the divergence in your evolutionary line—"

"Can we get back to the point?"

"Of course! By the way, I'd love to learn more about those hand signs."

"Whatever," she muttered, "I'll release it since you're so useless."

"Hey!" the Doctor exclaimed, slightly offended, "That was rude, very rude! Who figured out that it was an illusion? It was you who said that realization was the hardest part."

Kushina ignored him and looked to the wall with some apprehension. Illusionary techniques weren't her strong point, but she could at least disperse it…hopefully. She formed the sign, concentrated her chakra and whispered "Kai!" Easily enough the wall disappeared and gave away to an arched doorway that was much too clean cut to be there by accident of nature. It led into a dark hallway.

This entire thing struck her as suspicious. "This is way too convenient…" she muttered, "A door in this perfect hole here, and the Stone shinobi stopped chasing us…I think this is a trap."

"Well of course it is," the Doctor said with some exasperation, "Well, I mean, it is a good probability that it is. Or maybe it isn't. But, we'll just have to find out for ourselves now won't we?" His eyes exuded excitement and an adventurous curiosity that reminded Kushina of someone she knew very well. There was something off about this man, besides all the gibberish he was spouting before.

Kushina again only looked at her new companion with puzzled silence. She frowned at him, trying to figure him out, and he smiled back at her as if he knew what she was doing and was attempting to give her the best impression of him.

"You're odd," she said, "For a civilian. And you know more than a civilian should know. That's…"

"Aww…you're not suspicious of me again are you?" moaned the Doctor exasperatedly, childishly even, "I swear I'm not a spy. Cross my hearts, I swear."

"Heart_s_?"

"Yup! Hearts. I have two." He held up two fingers at her to make it even clearer.

"I'm not going to even start that again," muttered Kushina, "Well then fine. Let'say you're not an enemy spy—"

"—I'm not. Thought you decided I was too crazy to be a spy."

"And let's say I'm gonna believe you when you say you're a lost civilian who knows a lot about illusion techniques—"

"Well I am brilliant, you know—"

"—though you don't know how to even release a simple illusion."

"Well I—"

"And I'm just supposed to follow you through this perfectly convenient escape route that's just happened to be here? How do I know you're not working with the Stone shinobi just to lead me into a trap? I mean, the way you just showed up and that technique just stopped and here's this hole—it all smells suspicious."

"You do make a good case," the Doctor said, nodding "But you're wrong."

"How so?"

"Because I'm a superior alien from outer space. Why would I want with a rude, little ginger girl?"

"And that's evidence?" She scoffed, "And I'm not little."

The Doctor, to her surprise, remained silent for several moments. He regarded Kushina with a concerned frown, and his wide, expressive brown eyes were fixed on hers, following her every expression and seemingly attempting to expose her. She felt herself naked under his intense, interrogative stare and looked away quickly, her heart racing. She was reminded of the look he had given her when he had scanned her with his blue-ended screwdriver, as if his little tool told him all her secrets.

Much to her relief, he spoke again. His expression snapped back to jovial and his voice became light, "Aren't you a suspicious little thing. No worries, I'm not after you, promise. I don't have any weapons one me—you can even check—and I bet you can outrun me if you need to. Besides, that hall way is the only place to go, so unless you want to sit here and wait for someone to guess that you are buried under here and find you, I think it might be your only choice. What do you say?

She didn't respond, and still looked at him with suspicious eyes.

"Yes, so you know, I don't know here that tunnel leads so I can't have planned it out in advanced to get you to go where I want. I have to say, you're a very distrustful young lady, aren't you? Most people would be jumping at the chance of getting out of the hole, but you're acting like I'm out to _capture _you or something. Are you often this suspicious of people?" Then there was that look on his face again, Kushina noticed nervously, as if _he knew_. How could he not be there to capture her if he knew? He had to be lying.

"You're lying." Her accusation was quiet and full of contained apprehension. It seemed to surprise him.

"But I'm not. And If I was and wanted to kidnap you…I wouldn't do it like this; I prefer cleverer methods that involves less falling into holes and more talking. And I wouldn't be discussing any of it with you."

Kushina bit her lips. Despite all her suspicion, Kushina felt that there was something oddly familiar about him. That cheeky confidence reminded her of someone she knew well.

She looked to the darkened hall and said, "Fine. Let's go. But I'm still watching you."

"And I'll try to look my best." He pointed his sonic screwdriver at the gravity globe, and the ball of light floated down towards them. He guided it towards the hallway, where it waited for them.

Kushina merely pouted and looked at the brightened hallway. Well, really, she told herself, she had no other choice. She exhaled deeply. "Alright then! Let's go! Before that stupid ape from Stone shows up."

The Doctor brightened and flashed that wide mega-watt smile at her. "That's the spirit! Allons-y!"

"What?"

"Allons-y!"

"Is that your alien language or something?" she asked with a short and incredulous snort.

"Nope, it's French. Well, yes, I suppose it is alien…to you it would be. To me too if you think about it. And to the British too I daresay."

"Uh-huh…" Kushina muttered absently and stepped through archway into the tunnel. The Doctor followed closely behind.

"It means 'let's go' you know," he was saying, "But it has a nicer ring in French! Allons-y!"

"Allons-y," she tried.

"That's right!" the Doctor said with a short laugh, "You've got the accent down. Allons-y! I've once met a man named Alonso, so imagine saying—"

"Sounds stupid."

The Doctor looked at her, aghast. "Stupid? How could you? Kushina, you need to learn to open up your mind."

"You need to learn to shut up," she retorted petulantly.

"Rude and ruder still!" the Doctor exclaimed, shaking his head, though he was still smiling, "Didn't you mother teach you being rude is not becoming of a young lady?"

Kushina looked up at the Doctor, her expression dark and grim, and said, at length, "My mother is dead."

The Doctor's face fell immediately. "I'm sorry," he said quietly.

Kushina glanced at him, "What for? It's not like you killed her."

"I'm sorry for you. Losing someone is…" he trailed off, his eyes glazed as he tried hard not to think of them, all of them. Kushina looked up at him, curious by his sudden lack of words. She felt her heart tremble a bit when she saw that blank, faraway expression on his narrow face, as if he was trying to fling whatever sorrow existed for him as far as he could, both in his heart and mind, by pulling on such a mask. Anger and anguish pooled underneath it. Or, perhaps, she was only projecting her own emotions onto him. She had a habit of doing that. This bothered her; she didn't want sympathize with a man who might be trying to capture her. It clouded judgment: a no-no for a shinobi, not that she was much of a rule person.

"Painful," Kushina finished for him. Her voice had softened a little. She was looking at the Doctor curiously, with an edge of sympathy to her expression. "Who did you lose?"

The Doctor broke out of his daze and stared at her, "What?"

"Who did you lose?" she repeated, softly.

"Oh, nothing. That's not important."

"Could have fooled me…"

"What?"

"You looked like you were remembering something painful."

"Well, I—"

"Let's change the subject," Kushina said abruptly, looking forward, "This is too depressing. You don't look like you want to talk about it."

The Doctor looked at her in surprise, but he agreed. Instead of changing subjects, however, Kushina and the Doctor walked on in silence.

* * *

><p>Note: I apologize if the interactions and characterization is a bit off. It's been a big difficult recently to get it right. Kushina is a little more grumpy than I wanted her to be, but...yeah. Thanks for reading. Really, thank you!<p> 


	3. The Sacrificial Chamber

**Doubly Rude and Once Ginger**

Note:

I first wrote this with the intention of being a short, more or less humorous piece. But you know, when you get involved in anything, even a silly little fanfiction like this, your imagination can just run away with you and create an entire world/story. And so I have with this! It's going to become a full on cross over as I discovered, in my imagination, that Kushina would be an excellent companion for the Doctor. I have these brilliant (if I do say so myself) ideas in my head and I'm just dying to write them! So, yes, this story is gonna be more than 4-5 chapters long!

Again, thanks for the patience, and thanks for reading it! It empowers me to write!

* * *

><p>Chapter 3: The Sacrificial Chamber<p>

An uneasy silence fell on the Doctor and Kushina, one he didn't particularly appreciate. He was itching to know more about the world he was in and about his new little partner but he felt if there was any time to hold his tongue, it was now. The Doctor took this new silence to survey his surroundings. They were in a tunnel, yes, with its polish walls and ceiling. The light of the Gravity-Glo shone ahead of them just revealed more tunnels without any indication of ending or splitting into different paths. Only one destination, it seemed to him. The Doctor hoped it lead an interesting destination at the least, especially after all that running, falling and walking.

He glanced at Kushina, and tension lifted immediately. He couldn't hold back a grin. Her lips were puckered in a bit of a pout that made her look like a rather adorable child, especially on that shapely face that still sported traces of baby fat. He wondered if she took back her question in deference to him. That was awfully perceptive and kind of her and he greatly appreciated the gesture, because it spared him either the unpleasantness of answering or the awkwardness of trying to talk his way of it. He was most likely to do the latter in any case.

"This…" Kushina began suddenly, looking round with a scowl on her face, "This hallway is awfully long."

"Is it?" the Doctor said, looking around with wide eyes, "Although awfully long is awfully relative. Once I was on planet where everything was connected by miles of rather dreary looking tunnels, much like this one. Mole-race, they were, called themselves the Kathoones. Now _those _were awfully long and—"

"The what?"

"Kathoones—mole race. They are a blind race, like most burrowing, subterranean species, but don't let that fool you. Kathoone warriors are the sneakiest and most effective I've come across. Not unlike ninjas. Hah, that's brilliant—blind mole-ninjas! Or blind ninjas-moles."

Kushina gave him a doubtful look.

"They were!" the Doctor insisted. "They were quite formidable opponents. A lot more dangerous than ninja turtles."

Kushina looked unconvinced, though it wasn't the Kathoone ninja-mole/mole-ninja race she was concerned about. "I gotta to ask: if you're supposed to be an alien, how come you look…like me? I mean, aren't aliens supposed to be…not human looking?"

"Nope." The Doctor answered, with a firm shake of his head, "Humans aren't the only bipedal race in the universe you know. Billions of possibilities in the universe, and what you lot call the 'humanoid' form have evolved independently several times. We came first, so it's more correct to say it's you who look like me."

"Well, 'cause you're human," said Kushina matter-of-factly, "That's why I look like you."

"Nope! Wrong again. Didn't I say that the so called humanoid form evolved independently several times _just _now? Blimey, pay attention a little; I thought ninjas were supposed to be attentive and observant."

Kushina scowled and hmphed. However, she was finding it so awfully interesting that she just couldn't indulge her irritation. "Then what are you? What kind of species are you supposed to be?"

"Me? I'm a Time Lord." He shot an almost haughty smile at her. "Doubt you heard of us."

Kushina frowned at him. "Time _what_?"

The Doctor grinned even more broadly at her, and repeated, enunciating slowly, "Time Lord."

Her frown deepened. "Seriously?"

Well that wasn't the response he was used to. "Yes. Of course _seriously_. Why _not _seriously?"

"Well, I was thinking: what kind of stuck up species put the word 'lord' in their species name. I mean, says a lot, don't you think?"

The Doctor look slighted, and scoffed lightly. "You could talk—you lot named yourself _Homo sapiens_ _sapiens_ which, let me remind you, means 'wise man' in good ol' Latin—and from what I've seen of your human history, I'm not sure _Homo sapiens_ is even accurate—you daft apes—ooh haven't said that in a while—at least we named ourselves aptly—"

Kushina did not understand half the words he was saying—_Homo sapiens sapiens? Latin?_ She had to remind herself the man thought himself to be an alien. But _Time Lord_?

"Aptly?" Kushia repeated, quirking her brows in doubt, "But Time Lord is different! You can't possibly mean lording over time—"

"But that's exactly what I mean."

Kushina let out a short, incredulous laugh. "Riiight…first you're an alien, now you are a lord of time, and can bend time to your will. That's quite an imagination there, and pretty original too I gotta say. Never heard of the concept of a 'Time Lord' before. You'd be an awesome sci-fi novelist you know."

The Doctor gave a noncommittal shake of his head. "I've been told…though I much prefer living adventures than dreaming them—not that I don't admire novelist and writers mind you—they're brilliant!"

Whatever he said seemed to strike a chord with the young ginger. Her round eyes brightened, and she nodded fervently, exclaiming, "I agree!" The Doctor noted she sounded a little angry. "I'd rather be out there doing amazing things than being stuck in room just because I—" She stopped immediately, and released an impatient sigh. "Rather than reading all day long about other people and being protected. I want be what other people write about. I want to be the stories." She finished glumly with another sigh.

The Doctor looked at her sympathetically. Over 900 years ago, he remembered himself saying something very similar.

"Well, you are doing something aren't you?" The Doctor said gently, "You're here, out and about, right? Saved my life and all. And you're shinobi—your job is the stuff of stories."

Kushina flashed him an ironic smile. "Well, thing is—I've been put out of commission for awhile." A pause. "To be honest, I'm not supposed to be here."

The Doctor looked at her with a rueful smile, "Really now? A bit of a runaway then?"

Kushina looked suddenly guilty, puffed out her cheeks and released it with a tired sigh.

The Doctor grinned and nodded knowingly. "I have to say, running away to join a war isn't exactly the best way to look for adventure. I'd know."

To his surprise, anger suddenly flashed across the teenager's childish face. "Of course I didn't!" she snapped, "I'm not stupid! Don't you dare think that I would go looking for a war!"

The Doctor looked stunned. His large brown eyes took on a curious and sympathetic gleam, and he looked thoroughly chastised and apologetic. "I'm sorry," he said quietly, gently, and Kushina sensed that he was referring to more than his offhand comment.

She let out an impatient sigh. "—But enough of this. I'm not telling you anything anymore Doctor, because I don't know anything about you, and I won't trust you until you tell me everything."

The Doctor lifted his brows. "Everything?" he repeated doubtfully, "You don't trust anyone until they've told you everything? Mind you, that's a tough criteria for trust. No secrets with you at all then?"

Kushina rolled her eyes. "What I mean is—"

"—You can't really mean everything can you, cause there an awful lot of information there, a millennia worth of them. Of course we can start simple—like my favorite fruit? It's bananas by the way. Food really, favorite food. You know I invented the banana daiquiri centuries ahead. Made of the King of France jealous, me. And I hate pears." He made a disgusted face.

"I mean the important stuff!" she exclaimed hotly, "And don't knock pears, I happen to like them! They're high in fiber. And you can start with your name."

"Name?"

"You haven't told me."

"I haven't? No—I have! Have you forgotten already?" He crumpled his nose at her disapprovingly. "You really are the forgetful type, aren't you?"

"No you didn't," Kushina said slowly, "You just introduced yourself as 'the Doctor'."

"But that's my name."

"See, that's what I'm saying," Kushina grumbled, "You're name isn't the Doctor."

"Of course it is. Who are you to say it isn't?"

With an impatient huff, Kushina took several strides ahead, turned to face him and proceeded to walk backward.

"You might want to be careful doing that," The Doctor muttered, but she ignored him.

"Because, 'Doctor' is a title," she insisted, quite forcefully, "And a title isn't a name. Besides, a title of 'THE' Doctor is rather pompous don't you think. It's like you're saying that you are THE BEST Doctor. A definite article!"

"But I am," the Doctor insisted with a cheeky grin, "I'm rather brilliant you know."

She scrunched of her face in dislike and said, "You rival the Uchihas in arrogance. But really, honestly, what's your name?"

The Doctor was starting to feel irritation tug at him. "That Doctor, nothing more, nothing less."

"You parents can't have named you The Doctor!" she insisted, "They'd be insane."

"You'd be surprise that there are naming traditions on other planets that differs from yours," the Doctor replied, "Not every civilization names their children in the same way you humans and related species do! You're not alone in this universe you know."

"So your parents did name you the Doctor?" asked Kushina, looking amazed, "Is that what you're saying?" The Doctor was astonished by her apparent one track mindedness.

"Well, not exactly—"

"So you do have another name!" Kushina exclaimed triumphantly, "What is it?"

The Doctor marveled at her persistence. If she could channel that kind of energy to other things, she would definitely excel.

"It's just the Doctor!"

Kushina puffed impatiently, "Why are you being so stubborn?"

"Why are you?" the Doctor retorted, "Really Kushina, I have never met anyone who was _this_ occupied by my name. And believe me, the people I've are…well…"

"Maybe they didn't have the need to!"

He cocked an eyebrow at her. "And you do?"

"Yes, to see if I can trust you or not!"

"Oh, that makes so much sense, doesn't it? If a name is all you need to know to trust someone, then you'd end up trusting everyone you happen to meet."

"But how can I start trusting you if you refuse to tell me your name? It's just weird and big red flag signs goes up in my head, so yes—I think I have a reason to be cautious!"

"Kushina—I'll just say it once more—The Doctor is my name. Everyone calls me The Doctor, and I've been called The Doctor for over 900 years."

Kushina suddenly stopped, still facing him. She looked at him with an odd look of contemplation, and the Doctor could just imagine her brain trying to process what he had said.

"Fine," she decided stonily, "The Doctor it is, then." She wheeled around started walking again. The Doctor let out an relieved breath, and followed her. She stopped again suddenly, turned around and said, "900 years?"

The Doctor cocked a smile at her. "I look pretty good for nearly a millennium, don't I?"

Kushina looked like she was bursting with words, but she only rolled her eyes, shook her head and carried on.

So the two walked on, and the atmosphere became comfortable enough for the Doctor to start gleaning information about this planet, the almost-war, and his new ginger companion. He was careful so as not to appear nosy, with her being already so paranoid, but once he did start asking questions, Kushina was surprisingly open and talkative. He wondered what happened to all that paranoia from before. And boy did she like talking.

He learned that she liked to cook, though she didn't like to admit it. That her mother was rubbish in the kitchen, and it was her father who taught her to make rice because her mother just could not do it. Her favorite color was different shades of red and olive gray, which for some reason the Doctor noted more strongly than other tidbits of information that was spewing from her mouth. When they came to talking about her friends, she was particularly enthusiastic, especially about her best friend Namikaze Minato.

"…he's brilliant. I mean, some people say he's lucky 'cause his sensei is one of the Sannin, but I disagree! I mean, he doesn't come from an actual Shinobi clan. His mother was a shop lady, and his dad made chuunin after he did. Anyways, Sannin or not, he would beat everyone's ass cause he really smart. Plus, he's really good with people you know. Disgustingly charming when he wants to be, but in that I'm simple and adorable sort of way you know, not like super suave sort of way. I mean, he can do that too, I've seen him, but he's really quite sweet. Well, most of the time. He can be such a blonde idiot sometimes, that flake, like all guys of course—"

The Doctor felt like he was caught in what one would call 'girl talk', but he was grinning at her rather pronounced adoration of this Minato person all the same. It was quite cute, and her affections were very much obvious.

"So brilliant blonde idiot," he put in, which made her laugh. "Sound like you fancy him."

Kushina reddened. "Do not! Really, can't a girl be friends with a guy without all that?"

"Yes, but in this case—"

"And don't ever repeat what I said about him!"

The Doctor grinned knowingly. "Lips firmly sealed."

Not too soon after their compromise, the Doctor noticed that the walls had changed: strange carved symbols and letters started to appear all around them, covering the walls from the ceiling to the floor. The Doctor stopped to take a closer look at the symbols. He fished a pair of spectacles from his pocket, and examined a section with a puzzled frown.

"Can't be a language," he muttered to himself, "Cause the Tardis should have translated…"

"Of course it's not a language," Kushina muttered impatiently, "Look." She pointed a swirl symbol. "That's my clan symbol. They're all just insignia's of Konoha's clan. Well, all the clans associated with Konoha. My clan actually lives in Whirlpool Village. I moved to Konoha when I was kid."

"Ah I see," said the Doctor, nodding, "So we're somewhere familiar to you, are we?"

"No idea," she replied with a shrug, "Could be."

"Alright then, let's keep going! And Whirlpool Village? Really? I suppose it's more inventive than Leaf or Stone Village."

Kushina snorted at this. "Cause they're the shortened names. Really, the shinobi villages are called something like Village of the Hidden Leaf or Village Hidden in the Leaf. But Leaf is shorter."

"Ah. Well, that makes a bit more sense. Still, not much variety there is it?"

She shrugged, not knowing what to say to that. Shinobi were known for their austerity and utilitarianism, not their creativity. Kushina thought it was really such a bummer, because creativity begets progress and brilliant ideas. Plus, being creative was fun.

"How many are there?"

"Of what?"

"The Villages."

"Shinobi? Well, there are five great villages, and then there are smaller ones. Leaf, Stone, Sand, Mist, and Cloud are the five biggies."

"And they don't get along, I suspect, especially Leaf and Stone since they are in this almost-war."

"The shinobi villages rarely get on with each other," Kushina muttered darkly, "It's kind of stupid sometimes, 'cause they can't mind their own business."

"Ah, why am I not surprised? It's the story of the universe, really."

They continued walking until they came, quite abruptly, to the end of the tunnel. The wall facing them was starkly blank, solid and well…that was it. It was a blank, solid wall. No doors, no button or lever or anything to lead them further.

Kushina let out an angry groan. "Don't tell me this is a dead end!" she shouted, hitting the wall with her palms, "Come on, you stupid thing!" She turned to the Doctor, her expression fierce, "Use that blue thing to figure it out. Talk to the wall or something!"

"That was rude," the Doctor chastised, "The walls will never talk to us now that you called it a stupid thing. And this blue thing—" He brought out the sonic screwdriver and flipped it adeptly in his hand, "Is called a sonic screwdriver."

Kushina, for the first time, took a good look at the apparatus in his hand and a question popped into her head that she couldn't believe she never asked before. She glanced up at him and muttered, "I gotta ask, how can a screwdriver be sonic?"

"Oh you know," the Doctor said, grinning at her, "Through my technological brilliance."

"It doesn't even look like a screwdriver," she insisted, plucking the device from the Doctor's hand to examine it.

"Oi—" The Doctor reached to grab it back, but Kushina deftly turned away. Oh she's a slippery one, he thought irritably.

"Can it even you know…screwdrive things? Or drive screws or whatever?" she asked, turning it about and holding close to her narrowed eyes.

"Of course it can!" the Doctor exclaimed exasperatedly, "Put up a lot of cabinets with those. And it can detect dark matter. And anti-matter. Not to mention saved all of reality and space more than dozen of time."

"Huh," she muttered, unimpressed, but her survey of the alien tool was cut short when the Doctor took the chance to snatch it away from her.

"And ask before you grab things," the Doctor insisted, tucking his sonic screwdriver safely away in his coat pocket, "It's rude to take it from other people's hands. Blimey, I'm starting to sound like a broken record."

"Rude rude rude," Kushina mumbled dismissively, "Right then, do something about this wall already."

"Ah right—actually, it's the same as before," he said, facing the wall again, "Just do whatever you did before to release the illusion."

Kushina's face brightened with a hopeful smile. "Really? Brilliant! Alright, stand back!" Kushina stepped forward, brought her hands together into the needed hand sign, and shouted "Kai!"

The wall, to her complete pleasure, shivered, but as it did, it didn't reveal a door or passageway, but just the same wall.

"No way!" she shouted angrily, giving the wall an angry kick, "It didn't work! It _is_ a dead end!"

"Not so fast! Look, something is different." The Doctor pointed to a small outline of a square in the middle of the wall, that, if Kushina could correctly recall, wasn't there before.

"What is it?"

"It's a square."

Kushina rolled her eyes. "I can see that."

The Doctor smirked. "Well that's what it is. You didn't ask what it does."

"Don't get all clever with me, Doctor," she warned, irritated, "Not in the mood for it."

"Right right, well…I don't know what it does either." He brushed his fingers over the small square, and was surprised to feel a spark of telepathic energy concentrated in that little space. It wasn't just any telepathic energy, it was an identification patterned telepathic energy, which meant that this little square was a key, or rather the keyhole, that opened only when the right mental pattern connected with it. A telepathic door only opening for the right person. It was brilliant, really, and bit intriguing. It was surprising how much telepathic energy was being used on this planet. In fact, every since he landed, he had felt a heightened sense of mental energy that permeated not only the air, but the very earth itself. If he really stopped and observed any section of the wall, he could feel the telepathic energy radiating from it. The superhuman abilities he had seen from that man and Kushina was in no doubt connected to this rather odd phenomenon.

He grinned to himself. This was getting more interesting that he had expected! Now back to the square—of course, it wouldn't open for him. The square rejected him immediately. Made sense—he wasn't even the same species, so in no way was his neural pattern would be even similar to the ones that the square was supposed to recognize.

He glanced at Kushina curiously. Maybe she would work.

"Kushina, put your hand inside the square."

Kushina frowned at him. "Why?"

"Because I think you might be the key this time."

Kushina looked at him oddly, but she placed her left palm inside the square on all the same. The moment her skin touched the wall, it started to shake. Kushina let out a surprised yelp and jumped back a little.

The wall disappeared, and pitch darkness greeted them.

"Well then," the Doctor muttered with a self-satisfied grin. He took out his sonic again, pointed at the Gravity Globe, which flew into the room and flooded it with even more light. He grinned at Kushina, who grinned back, though a little uncertainly. "Allons-y!"

The Doctor stepped through the doorway, and found himself in a surprisingly large chamber with a high rock ceiling, and partially polished stone walls. From where he entered, he was looking down into the room from above, and he could see two long rectangular stone table placed side by side below. A rudimentary stone staircase was just to his left, and he quickly flew down the steps, his mind hungering to explore his new environment, not even remembering to glance back at Kushina.

"Wonder what this is about," he muttered as he descended the stairs. At the head of the two tables, there was another long stone table placed perpendicularly to the others. This one, however, had strange letters and symbols carved into it. He put on his spectacles and peered closely at the markings, frowning his usual analytical way as he tried making sense of the symbols. He was puzzled as to why he couldn't read it or recognize it. At least not yet. There was something familiar about it, but something not quite—he couldn't put a finger on it.

He went to the tables that lay side by side, cocking his head to the side when he discovered what looked like metal bindings on both, which he hadn't noticed above. He fingered them, realizing that they were hand shackles, used to secure a body to the tables.

"But they're not tables," he muttered to himself, "They're some sort of bed—no—like ancient…no…" He scratched his head, frowned and looked around wildly. He finally understood: two human sized stone tables with metal bindings. A head table with strange symbols—this was the very picture of a sacrificial set up—a sacrifice chamber or at least some primitive surgery theatre. But for what?

"Kushina, you better come down here and look!" he called, still peering down at the tables. He moved back to the table with the carved symbols and looked again at the carvings, more carefully this time. Then it started to make sense, those strange symbols—but it was—"It couldn't be!" he exclaimed to himself, "This kind of mental and physical energy manipulation is uncalled for, especially in a world like this—no—this is a bit different." These symbols were referring to, if he was remembering right, to a mass energy transference…from one living body to another. What was this? "Kushina! Come down here! Kushina?" He paused for an answer, and received silence. That was odd—the girl liked to talk, and by now she would have made a comment or something. Concerned, the Doctor climbed up the steps, "Kushina?"

The Doctor stopped in his tracks when he saw her, and his hearts shivered with pity at the sight. Kushina, who had been so lively, stubborn and rude before, was slumped against the wall, with the expression of utter horror and panic distorting her young, pretty face. Her eyes were wide with fright, unblinking and shimmering with fresh tears.

"Kushina?" he called gently, carefully, as if she would crumble any second, "What's wrong? What is it?"

She seemed to have finally noticed him, and turned her tear filled eyes on him, her expression still of stricken terror. She blinked, the tears spilling, and shook her head at him slowly, doubt and anger now evident on her face.

"You!" she cried hoarsely, "You liar! You brought me here on purpose!"

"What?" the Doctor exclaimed, stunned at the passionate accusation, "Why would I—"

"Well bad news for you, Doctor—whoever you are!" she spat, each world accented with such burning anger that it made the Doctor cringe. "There's no way you can handle him. You can't stuff him in any old thing like you can do to Shukaku! And unless you have another compatible Uzumaki there's now way you can extract him and take him—if you release him we all will be killed so don't even think you about it sneaky, lying bastard!"

"Him?" the Doctor repeated, astonished and completely confused, "Kushina, whatever you're thinking, it's not true!"

"Don't lie to me!" she growled, "You conspired to bring me here didn't you? Though this chamber can hold him? But it can't I'm telling you! You rat! Oh I knew it! I shouldn't have—"

"Look," the Doctor interrupted urgently, holding his hand up to her. He took a step forward, and realized too late it was the wrong thing to do. She took it as a sign of aggression, and launched into full combat mode. She moved blindingly fast, and the Doctor was convinced he had never gotten a beating this bad before, especially not from a 16 year old ginger girl. She kicked him in the chest, deftly pulled his two hands behind his back and flipped him backwards so that he landed on his face. This really wasn't his more muscular bodies-his previous body would be able to take more of this beating, but Rassilon, the girl can kick!

Before he could assess any damage, she turned him over and slid the cool blade of an oddly shaped dagger under his neck, and looked down met his eyes with cold fury. In his pain, he wondered what terror she had experience so she could wear such an expression with that much depth.

"Now tell me, no more lies or I slit your throat!" she growled, "Who are you?"

"Slit my throat?" he repeated, coughing, "Really? Could you?"

"Yes," she answered, her voice hard. The Doctor looked into her eyes and believed her, and how he felt sorry for her at that moment. The fear in her eyes just broke his heart.

"I'm the Doctor," he said quietly, holding her furious gaze.

"Don't lie!"

"Kushina. I'm not." He continued, gently still, trying to pacify her, "I'm called the Doctor. I am over 900 years old, and I'm a Time Lord from Gallifrey. Here—I can show you." He slid his free hand to her temple, quickly before she could react, and spilled his memories into her. Selective memories of course, just one pertaining to his identity, to show her that he was not what she thought he was.

The contact only took a second, and he released her immediately. Kushina gasped, and threw herself off of him, crouching on the ground and cradling her forehead.

"That was…" she whimpered between heavy breaths, "Doctor…?"

"Yes," he answered, still lying on his back, breathing as fast she was, "I'm the Doctor." He gathered all his will and strength, and with a burst of energy, pushed himself into a sitting position. He groaned, the pain from Kushina's kicks and punches stinging his chest and stomach, and for a moment he was sure he broke a rib or two. But that wasn't important right now.

He looked at Kushina, who was still holding her head, staring at the ground and breathing heavily. He needed to clear this up—he needed to know why this was affecting her so.

"Kushina?" he tried again, softly.

"Yeah?" she answered, her voice trembling. She was staring down at the ground, as if she was afraid to look at him, with eyes unblinking.

"Kushina…does this…have anything do with the fact that you have a mass of energy equivalent to half a dozen hydrogen bomb compressed in your stomach?"

Kushina slowly turned her eyes to him. They were filling with tears, and the Doctor found, with great surprise, deep sympathy and sadness in those eyes—sympathy and sadness for _him_.

"So many…" she began, her voice broken with suppressed sobs, "So many times…"

The Doctor blinked, confused. "What?"

"You've died…so many times…" She sobbed, letting her tears flow freely now, "How could you stand it?"

"Oh." So that what she meant. She had picked that out from the memories he had given her? He had paid special attention to leaving unneeded things out. He was glad he didn't let on anything relating to the Time War.

"Does it…scare you…every time?"

Doctor let out a sigh. He did not like discussing his deaths and regeneration. "Look, that's not important—"

"Yes it is!" she snapped angrily, "How could dying not be important? You did so nine times!"

"Kushina, please, just answer my question! We can talk about me later."

"You answer mine first!" She looked at him challengingly, her eyes ablaze with a sort of justified anger.

He returned her fiery glare, and a tense silence divided them for several moments, and in the end it was him, the 900 year old Time Lord, who relented. Besides, he told himself, they weren't going to get anywhere, especially when she was so stubborn and had a one-track mind.

"Yes," he answered finally, his voice quiet and hoarse, "Every time. Even when I know I'll still live, it scares me every time." He let out a tired sigh and looked up at the ceiling.

"That's good," Kushina whispered.

Surprised, the Doctor looked at her with a questioning gaze. "Good?"

"Yeah," she answered, "It means you still value life. That…you don't have this blasé attitude towards it. That's good."

He frowned at the little teenage ginger girl who had just uttered something so very wise, and he found himself marveling at her. Humans—they were such a rich species, and how he loved them, wherever they were, wherever they ended up.

"I'm a host," she said finally, with a teary, confessional sigh, her shoulders slumping and her eyes glazing as she spoke, "I'm the host of the Nine-tailed demon fox." She looked at him with a sad smile. "I'm a walking prison. A living bomb."

The Doctor could only look at her; both anger and sorrow rising in him as he fully comprehended what she meant. The resigned sadness in her voice broke his hearts, and his large brown eyes widened with a deep empathy and sadness. "I'm so sorry," he said, and he really really meant it, like he always does. "I'm so so sorry."

* * *

><p>Note: I know...on a sad note. Thanks for reading this silly little crossover!<p> 


	4. Brilliant Blond Idiot

Doubly Rude and One Ginger

Abstracted

Note: I love crossovers, and Doctor Who is perfect for crossovers. You can cross anything with DW. You name it, and it can work 90% of the time with DW. For now, after this, I've got my sight on a DW/HP and DW/Buffyverse. After this, of course, or maybe when I've made good headway into this story. AHH I love fanfiction. The possibilities! Fan service. It's too wonderful.

And thanks for all the support!

* * *

><p>4: Brilliant Blond Idiot<p>

Kushina knew she had done it. She told someone her secret. Someone beside the Hokage, the Elders and Biwako-san knew about her demonic tenant, and dear gods, she realized how much trouble she would be in if they found out she told. Now there was no going back from this. More importantly, this man who was not a man, not according to the images that she saw in her head anyways, knew this. Perhaps it was just as well he was not a man.

And when he had touched his hand to her temple—the things she saw! She lost her breath for a second: ten faces, nine deaths! The pain of each change, and the deep sadness of having to become someone else, and to know that you might not love the same thing or worse, the same people, after you had changed. Despair and sorrow washed over her as those images flashed through her mind's eyes, and she could feel that he was trying hard to filter out his emotions. She saw little of anyone else in those images. A little dissenting voice in her brain told her this could be an elaborate illusion technique, but Kushina was tired of being suspicious.

And when he told her, his brown eyes dark with pity, "I'm so sorry. I'm so so sorry…" Kushina was surprised. No one has ever apologized to her for being a host—for having to be a host. Not even her own mother, although she did so with her eyes, Kushina liked to think. And she would have replied "I'm sorry too" if she wasn't so caught up in her own pity and tears. She was so sorry that he had to die and change nine times, and that every time he lost a bit of everything he held dear.

"They did it here," the Doctor stated glumly, looking at Kushina with a sympathetic frown, "That's what I was seeing, wasn't it? The formula and calculation for a mass psychic and energy transfer."

Kushina nodded numbly. She had no idea what he meant by 'formula and calculation' but it seemed close enough to 'formulation of seals'. "Yes. Here. Long ago."

The Doctor knew so much but in ways as if he were just discovering them. This made sense, considering he was literally not of her world. He watched her with a sad frown—but there was something else in his expression, something dark and angry and so old. But she only saw it for the briefest moment, before he went to merely looking tired and ran his hand through his already messy brown hair.

"Why would they do this?" he asked, his voice taking on an edge of anger, "Why would they put a demon or whatnot—anything with that much destructive power in a young girl?" He paused and looked more closely at Kushina. "And why you?"

She swallowed thickly and forced out a breath, trying to calm her anxious heart. Something burned at the back of her throat. A ball of anger threatened to rise up and verbalize her anger at every injustice done to her. She wanted to scream and throw a tantrum, and tell him, the Doctor, the man who was not one of them, what they had done to her. She wanted the satisfaction of an outburst she had silenced in the name of common good, and she yearned, for the strangest reason, for the comfort of the Doctor's ire. "'Cause…'cause I'm an Uzumaki, and I'm one of five kids my age who was compatible and whose parents…didn't have the money or influence to wheedle their kid out of it."

The Doctor released an exasperated sigh at this, muttering bitterly, "Of course. That's what it comes down to. Bloody money. Currency. Worst idea in the history of reality. Well, after pure evil, that is. Well…greed would be worse too I think." He leaned forward slightly, carefully and slowly so that the aches and pains in his body didn't all simultaneously flare up. "What I do not understand first, Kushina, is the why of that why? Why kids? Why you? And why does it need to be sealed away at all? What is the nine-tailed demon fox?"

Kushina hesitated. She regarded the Doctor, who was sitting there in pain and nursing the sores she had bestowed upon him, who she didn't understand at all but at the same time she felt like she knew so well. There was that desire again, that yearning to tell him everything because she felt like he would be on her side and be angry for her because _she _was not allowed to be. Why she felt that was a mystery to her, but the Doctor felt like a kindred, like he could _understand_ her monsters and be alright with it. She sensed, with good reason too, that he had experiences with all types of monstrosity and scars. It comforted her.

"That's a lot of questions…" Kushina muttered, shaking herself out of her thoughts.

The Doctor shot her a knowing half grin. "Alrighty then, let's start with this: what is the nine-tailed demon fox?"

Kushina's face darkened slightly as she thought out her answer. "The nine tailed fox is a demon made out of chakra, evil chakra. And if it isn't sealed away, it can attack people, or worse, evil people can gain control of it and attack innocent people. Which was what happened like decades ago, and the demon had to be seal away."

"Alright, I can understand that," the Doctor muttered, nodding, "Evil, bad, sealed away. Now, why kids? Why not just…put it in a jar, or a mountain, or human adult? I can name thousands of other alternatives to children." His tone seemed to rise a bit in anger as he spoke, and Kushina noted with righteous satisfaction.

"The demon can't be sealed in an inanimate object, at least the nine-tails can't," she answered slowly, "There isn't anything powerful enough to hold the Demon fox. Living, active chakra has to be constantly suppressing it. That means we can only seal it in a living person, especially a person with powerful restrictive chakra, like an Uzumaki naturally does. And, certain Uzumaki variety of chakra works best. I happen to have it. Luck of the draw, that's me!" She made a face. "Anyways, the earlier it's sealed inside a person, the less side affects the host experiences, and the more powerful the seal will be."

"I see." He glanced down at her stomach. "So this fox demon is inside you?"

"Yeah."

"Does it hurt?"

"Rarely."

"But it does sometimes?"

She nodded and cracked a wry smile. "Gives me bellyache from hell. But it's rare, and at time I'm _really _sick or weak."

The Doctor merely nodded. He released a groan and sigh, and then pushed himself off the floor and onto his feet.

"Ohh…" he muttered softly, gingerly feeling his stomach, "Think you fractured a rib or two." He glanced down at Kushina with mock disapproval. "Bit rude, that. Rude and ginger, you are. Completely rude. And you flipped me! I rarely get flipped, at least not by 16 year old ginger girls." Smiling, he offered Kushina a hand. "Upsy?"

Kushina looked surprised at first at sudden shift of atmosphere (and mood), but could not help but giggle, if a little incredulously, as she took the Doctor's hand and let him help her up.

"Rude, was it?" she said, laughing nervously, "I think rude is an understatement to describe the beating you took Doctor. Sorry about that."

The Doctor dismissed it with a brilliant grin, "Been through worse. I've had my entire biology rewritten and every cell of one of my hearts went through rapid apoptosis. Let me tell you Kushina, that _wasn't _fun."

"No kidding," She mumbled, blandly, "Anyways, I've gotta ask Doctor—"

"I do love your need to ask," the Doctor stated with a short chuckle. Kushina couldn't tell if he was being sincere or sarcastic.

"—Earlier, you asked me…why I have…whatever amount of bombs inside me…that means you knew that something was inside me beforehand?"

"Yes," the Doctor answered gravely, "When I scanned with my sonic, I detected an alarming amount of…energy stuff in you." He tugged at his ears as he frowned at Kushina. "Couldn't quite figure out what type of energy 'cause I could sense different types just…all jumbled and mashed up in there."

"Well I do have two types of chakra in me…" Kushina said thoughtfully, "That's probably why…"

"Now clear this up for me once and for all, Kushina," said the Doctor, focusing intense brown eyes at her, "What is chakra, exactly?"

"Its…" she began uncertainly, ruffling about in her memory, "A power source, I suppose. It's the molding of physical energy in every cell and spiritual energy gained from experience and…something—oh—exercise! It's a bit of a problematic definition really. Cause, more things go into the development of chakra, or so I've been told. That's the academy school textbook definition, anyways."

"It definitely has a psychic component," the Doctor muttered, narrowing his eyes in thought. His mind whirred crazily as he recalled earlier events, from the tidal wave earthquake, to the creation of an almost-sentient clone and the psychic energy that he felt radiating from the environment. Though on closer inspection of the energy, he realized it wasn't fully psychic, more _psychic-like_, though there was, as he stated before, a psychic component to the energy chakra he was detecting. Psychic abilities alone could not create clones or move the earth—the other components of chakra was something strange, something _rare_. Then there was this demon made of evil chakra. _Evil psychic energy, but individualized into an entity?_ Though whatever psychic energy entity it was, it was sealed inside of this poor girl by way of some pretty complicated mathematically realized psychic transference. Now that, however much he disapproved, was impressive.

"And your mum and dad allowed this to happen, did they?" asked the Doctor, suddenly remembering her parents.

"Yes…" Kushina answered quietly, "Like I said, it was…beyond their control. Besides, it was for the good of the clans…so they couldn't have been selfish and said no."

The Doctor grimaced at this. "Selfish? Wanting your child safe is selfish? Blimey, then every mother in the entire universe is selfish! Anyways—and the rest of the population are okay with this too?"

"Well…" she answered slowly, "Actually, you're only one of the handful of people who does. My parents knew. The Hokage—our village leader, knows. My seal master knows. The Council knows, and so does Biwako-sama—she sort of like my warden."

"So it's a secret to the general public?"

"Of course it is!" she exclaimed hotly, "If people knew!" There was look of horror on her face. "I'd be hated and estranged! I'll be abandoned by my friends! You have no idea how people look at hosts, especially hosts of the nine tails."

"You mean there are more like you?" the Doctor asked in surprise.

"Yes. There are nine of us, for nine tailed beasts," she spat out as an answer, "And we're not exactly loved."

"Your village has nine—"

"Not Konoha. Other villages too. Konoha only has me."

The Doctor looked horrified at this point, trying to comprehend the existence of nine children like Kushina, all with evil chakra equivalent of several hydrogen bombs stuffed into them. These kids literally were walking bombs.

"That's just…ridiculous!" he sputtered angrily, "Absolutely disgusting! You're just child—16, Kushina, a child!"

"You have a better way of containing nine evil demons?" she snapped, "Cause if you do Doctor, please share!"

But the Doctor was off on his own rant now, "Yet they don't treat you well? Hate you and abandon you? What kind of thanks is that for children who they have sacrificed to keep _them_ safe? That's disgusting—"

"You can't blame them," she growled, "I mean…it's not the most comfortable thing being around a literal bomb you know. Would you be okay with having a—what did you call it—a hydrogen bomb around you all day? Would _you_ be friends with a bomb? Would you want your children to play with a bomb?" _Why are you defending them?_ A bitter voice in her mind screamed, _he's right, it _is_ disgusting!_

"But Kushina, you're a person, not a bomb! That's different. And it's the demon, not you!"

"It's the same! I'm a shinobi, and we're just tools in the large scheme of things, and so am I!" she seethed. She hated every word coming out of her own mouth, but she could not help it, because she believed them to be true.

"Is that how you see yourself?" asked a revolted Doctor, "You think of yourself as a tool?"

"'Cause that's what I am," Kushina answered heatedly, her eyes misting over with angry tears, "I'm a weapon, even more so as a host. That's what we are as shinobi, we're nothing more than tools. And as host, it's even worse!"

The Doctor, looking horrorstruck and wide-eyed, ran frustrated hand through his hair and down his face. "But that's so wrong, Uzumaki Kushina, so wrong, I couldn't even tell you how _wrong_ you are! You're person, a living breathing person! Not anyone's tool or weapon. As a host, you should be valued even more. And you are not defined by whatever they forced inside you!"

Kushina sniffed and quickly wiped away her tears. She wanted everything he had said to be true, she needed it to be true, but the reality was different: she was a tool, and she was, no matter how much she cried and screamed and kicked and complained, defined by the demon inside her. She was Uzumaki Kushina, host first, shinobi second, and a girl last.

"So no one else knows?" his voice quieter now, less harsh and more sympathetic, "Just those big shots, your warden, and mum and dad?"

"Yeah… And you can't let on that you know or they'd…do bad stuff to you. And please, don't tell other people. They can't find out Doctor. My friends, they'll all leave me. And Minato. If he finds out, he's gonna start treating me different. He'll distance himself…and I can't have that, not him."

The Doctor snorted bitterly. "If your blond idiot is as wonderful and amazing as you say he is, then he wouldn't."

Kushina looked up at the Doctor with darkest, angriest glare she could muster, and suddenly grabbed the Doctor's tie, yanked on it and pulled his face down to her level, ignoring his protests and shouts: "Don't say that! Don't you dare!" She shoved him backwards, and her furious and desperate eyes were still locked onto him.

The Doctor realized he had made a huge mistake saying what he did—not just because she had become so violently angry, but because he saw an aching vulnerability behind her ferocity, and it hurt her so very much.

"That's unfair, so unfair!" she continued, tears spilling profusely from her eyes now. "Don't pull that one me! He's the only one, out of all them that I…care really…I mean, he's so wonderful to me, even when I was the new kid and even when people picked on me. He's my best friend, and he's always been there for me, he saved my life in so many ways. If I lose him, I'd have no one…my parents are gone, and he's all I have left."

"But there is always someone else, Kushina. If he abandons you because of this, he didn't deserve your friendship or your admiration."

"Oh shut up Doctor. Just shut up! That's not fair! You don't understand. I'm not going to risk it over some idealist bullshit about 'oh, if he was any good, he'd accept that you are host to a murderous demon which may take over you any moment and destroy all that is good!' 'Cause you know what Doctor, _he's_ the best I know!"

She started sobbing, which really wrenched the Doctor's two hearts and he regretted even pushing the conversation to this point. The poor girl! Marked, destined to be hated, and so afraid! The Doctor wanted to reach over pulled her into a tight comforting hug, but he hesitated as the pain in his abdomen reminded him of what a tetchy Kushina could do.

"I'm sorry," he said instead, looking at the poor teenager sadly, "I won't ever tell anyone, especially not Brilliant blond idiot."

Kushina sniffed as her anger and sobs dissipated. She accepted his apology with a nod and more sniffing and wiping away tears.

"Anyways, Doctor," Kushina continued, through her subsiding sobs, "I don't like this place, let's get outta here. I'll go insane with anger if I stay here any longer."

The Doctor looked at her in surprise. "You know the way out?"

"Now I do," she answered, looking around in distaste, "I've been here before, remember? There's an actual front opening to this place."

"Well then!" The Doctor sighed. He beamed at her encouragingly. "Kushina, lead the way."

* * *

><p>"I guess this really was a trap…" the Doctor mumbled to Kushina as the Rock shinobi advanced on them, quite menacingly too. They had come out of the sacrifice chamber right into the hands of a dozen rock ninjas. A handful of newly arrived shinobi placed themselves between the Doctor and Kushina, and the opening, preventing them from running back into the chamber<p>

"Uzumaki Kushina…" one of the Rock shinobi, a very average looking shinobi with dark hair and nasty grin spoke to her. "You'll be coming with us, little girl."

"I'd rather not," Kushina mumbled, looking around in a panic. Okay, they were outnumbered two to a dozen. Not good. "Look, you want me, let this man go—"

"—No, Kushina—"

"—Shut up! He's innocent."

"Aww, ain't the lil one cute and noble?" the same shinobi chuckled, "I like the feisty noble ones. Love my job. Now—"

"Look," the Doctor began, all business-like, "Let's talk this out, shall we? This is hardly an ideal situation—well for us anyways—but think about this: you want her for her tenant, am I right? From what I understand that if you hurt her you run the risk of letting the demon possess her, which, I might add, does not do anyone any good."

The shinobi looked at him oddly. "Demon? What in the blazing hell you talking about?"

Dumbfounded, the Doctor blinked at him, glanced Kushina, and then back the shinobi. "You don't know why you're after her?"

"All we know is that she's important," the man growled, "Now enough of this talking! Get them! Kill the civilian."

The rock shinobi acted blindingly fast. A handful of them had Kushina restrained before she could cry out "No!" Another set of them moved to dispatch the Doctor who, for all his Time Lord superiority, could not keep up with the super human speed. He thought he was breathing his last in this body when he felt the sharp blade brush his throat, but it was all he felt.

The next few moments were a blur of confusion. A streak of yellow and black threw off his assailants with alarming ease, and freed Kushina of her captors. The Rock shinobi shifted their focus to this startlingly fast new player on the field who seemed to be working against them. Only when Kushina and Doctor were safely away from the shinobi did their savior stop moving, and stood, with an air of protectiveness, between them and the Rock shinobi.

Just from his back, the Doctor could tell it was a young man. He instantly noted the bright blond hair which contrasted starkly with the black, leather coat. This struck him as odd—the coat was not in the style of this world at all, at least as far as he knew. No shinobi in any reality wore long, black leather coats. The man looked like he walked off the streets of New York or London with that one. He noted how worn in the coat was, and the leather gloves seemed like it had seen better days.

The Doctor entertained the thought that perhaps this man wasn't a shinobi until he heard Kushina's bewildered voice, gasping, "Minato?"

"What?" the Doctor exclaimed in surprise, looking from Kushina to the supposed Minato "Is that brilliant blond idiot?"

Kushina blushed momentarily and threw the Doctor a warning look.

"One moment, Kushina," Minato said, without looking back at them. Then he was a flash of black and yellow again, charging at the Rock shinobi with a speed that boggled even the Doctor. With ruthless and anonymous efficiency, the leather clad Minato struck his opponent until not one remained. The opposing side barely had time to perform any techniques. After a few short minutes, the dozen Rock shinobi lay dead at his feet, and neither the Doctor or Kushina actually glanced his face.

Stunned, they could only gape at what they were seeing. Carnage in seconds, it was! It made the Doctor sick.

"Minato?" Kushina asked breathlessly, "Is that you?

He finally turned to them, and indeed he was a young man, though older teenager was more accurate—around Kushina's age. His blue eyes were catching, but they were tired and somber and old. Now that really caught the Doctor's attention: there was unmistakable age, great age, in those deceptively young eyes. When Minato looked at Kushina, the Doctor noted they seemed to light up just a little bit.

"It is you!" Kushina exclaimed happily, "You saved us!" She rushed forward and threw her arms around him. Minato stiffened in response, though Kushina did not notice.

She pulled back and looked at him up and down with a critical eye. "Just what are you wearing?"

A smile tugged at his previously passive face. "This? Don't you like it?"

"Uh. I dunno," Kushina replied, crinkling her noise, "I mean, didn't think leather coats were your style at all."

"Me neither," Minato said softly, "Amazing how things can change given the right circumstances and…time…"

The Doctor could hear the unmistakable undercurrent of sadness to his words, sadness that sprung from fatigue, sadness that sprung from having lived too much. Of course the Doctor would know, because it was all he felt sometimes, and all he could feel.

Kushina was also looking at Minato oddly, but she seemed to shake off any suspicious she might have had easily. The Doctor, on the other hand, knew something was up. But it wasn't just the way Minato talked or the odd way he dressed—the Doctor could smell time wafting from him. He was mired in it: time, broken and twisted timelines, and the smell of ancientness. The Doctor eyed him suspiciously: whoever this person was, it couldn't be Kushina's best friend.

"We have to leave," Minato said urgently, "Come on. There's a Konoha team nearby. I'll hold back the other Rock nins creeping about here."

"Right," Kushina agreed, nodding, "Let's go." She turned to the Doctor, grinning brilliantly, "This is Minato, Doctor! And Minato—this is the Doctor. He's an alien."

Minato barely seemed fazed by the last bit of info. He merely gave the Doctor the smallest of smiles, though it was surprisingly a warm smile.

"Ah, so this is Minato," The Doctor said with a bright grin, "Couldn't shut up about you, this one."

"Doctor!" Kushina hissed.

"Pleased to meet you," Minato returned passively. He turned to Kushina sharply: "Look Kushina, there's a path down that way—" He motioned in the direction to their right. "It's dirt, but it's clearly marked. Following it should take you were you need to be."

_Where you need to be. _Now Doctor thought this was a curious phrase.

"Alright then," said Kushina, nodding, "Let's go. Come on Doctor!"

Kushina and the Doctor followed Minato's direction and found the path he spoke of, while Minato trailed behind them. A new group of Rock shinobi seemed to jump out of nowhere and attacked them.

"You and the Doctor go ahead," Minato told them as he once again put himself between them and their assailants, "I'll handle them."

"No way," Kushina growled angrily, "I can fight!"

"NO!"

Kushina jumped and stared at Minato, stunned at the outburst and obviously hurt. Then it turned into anger. "No _what_? You can't tell me what to do! I can take'em!"

"No," he repeated, this time more softly and a bit more apologetic, "You protect Doctor, get him to safety, where he can…you both will be safe. This is important."

"But—"

"He's right Kushina," the Doctor put in. He and Minato's eyes met, and understanding passed between them. He knew this Minato was not just Kushina's best friend, if he was Minato at all. This Minato was something else.

"I need to get to the Tardis, Kushina," said the Doctor, "Help me find it."

"Go," Minato added firmly, "Not much time here."

"Fine!" Kushina cried angrily, "But I'm not letting you off easily. Come on Doctor!"

Kushina rushed off in huff. The Doctor cast a leery glance at Minato, and followed after the ginger shinobi.

* * *

><p>Note: Thanks for reading! I really do love you all and appreciate it! And thanks for the reviews and comments and kind words! It really helps!<p> 


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